Changing Lanes
January 22, 2011
I am a super impatient driver. I rarely follow the speed limit, and get extremely frustrated when people are in the fast lane going the speed limit. I think that my impatient nature is in full swing when I’m behind the wheel. I’ve taken the Strengths Finder assessment and my third strength is Activator. It pretty much means that once the direction is set, I have to get going. When I’m in route to my destination in my car and hit traffic–particularly if it’s a drive that doesn’t usually have traffic–I get frustrated. I know the potential. I know how a highway full of competent, focused drivers can flow. However, I also know that there are people who are texting, eating, talking, or just plain lolly gagging all of which slow them down. Multitasking is great, don’t get me wrong, but when it greatly slows down your pace, is it really worth it?
I had a conversation with some friends of mine the other day about their family. Both parents work, and their kids are too young for school so they have them both in daycare. They were talking about the stress of it all, and how financially tight things were. It made me think of a study that a gal did in one of my college classes. She found that the financial benefits to putting kids in day care were often slim to none after all expenses were factored in for households with two working parents. At the end of the day, I guess it all depends on what the “expenses” are for each couple, but I couldn’t help but think of the time expense as those parents would never make enough money to buy back the lost time with their young kids. Now don’t get me wrong, for some families, both parents make outrageous amounts of money and the costs of daycare, cars, babysitters, meals, etc. are not a big deal, but how much does time cost? How much would you pay for another day with someone you love who is taken from your life unexpectedly? Or how about time with a best friend who moved far away and you never get see anymore?
Whether it’s my expectations for how someone should drive, or the time I spend with family or friends, they rarely meet my ideal. I always wish my job had fewer demands, more pay, and was less stressful. I wish that people would be more attentive when they drove. I wish that I could take back the money that I spent on things that I didn’t actually need, that never made me happy anyway, but that I then spent months paying for on a credit card. I wish I could have avoided the devision that resulted from arguments I’ve had over petty preferences rooted in pride. I wish that I never would have pursued illegitimate means of satisfying legitimate needs. I wish I could handle the “trials” of my life with greater confidence.
I am becoming hopeful that my “wishes” can become my reality for the future. I’m realizing that the wisdom to make better decisions, to invest in the relationships that matter, and to swallow my pride is available. James 1:5 puts it this way, “If any of you lacks widsom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him.” I am also realizing that wisdom is not just knowing the right information, but it’s implementing it.
An excerpt from a book I’m reading said it this way…
“My Child, do not expect the trials to be lighter than in the past. Why should you think the tests would be less severe? I test all things, and there are areas of your life that as yet I have not touched. Do not look for respite. The days ahead may call for greater endurance and more robust faith than you ever needed before.
Welcome this, for you must surely know how precious are the lessons learned through such experiences. Even if you are unable to fully anticipate them with joy, you can certainly gain an appropriate appreciation of them in retrospect.
Apply your heart to learn wisom. This goal transcends every other aim, and any other good that comes out of a pressure period is an added blessing in excess.
Seek Me above all else.”
I think it’s hard to seek God in the moments when I’m frustrated with traffic, things at work, family, or just life in general. But I’m learning that I can change lanes. I can plan ahead for traffic and expect that the unexpected will put a wrench in things from time to time. It’s my choice to seek a relationship with God that grants me wisdom in every situation of life. I always have a choice.
